Reasons An Affair Can Make A Marriage Stronger

Published July 31st, 2008

by Alex Archer

The initial emotional responses to learning of a spousal extramarital affair can be all-engulfing. Naturally, you are the last one to learn about it. And now you know. Everything your life has been based on for years is now in question. You feel you can’t possibly go on together now that pain, sorrow, and anger are overwhelming you. You ask yourself endlessly why the person you married out of love doesn’t feel the same emotions regarding your marriage as you still feel despite the passage of time. But perhaps it doesn’t have to mean the ending of your marriage.

So are their reasons to stay married after an affair? Yes, there are. Have you ever looked at another person and lusted? Have you ever thought about what it would be like to be with another lover? Maybe you have unintentionally flirted with one of those people. The point is, we are all human. We make mistakes, but we learn from those mistakes.

One reason to remain together after an affair is that working through difficulties causes both individuals to grow, together and separately. The strengths that can be garnered from working past an affair together are innumerable. It’s not the good times that make a relationship strong, it has to do more with the ability to handle issues, pitfalls, and even seeming disasters together that serves to cement and reinforce the relationship and build up the marriage. Why not an affair as well?

Sometimes, as human beings, we don’t remember to think things through, and instead act hastily. Perhaps that is what brought about this affair. It doesn’t matter very much who is the one that wandered off into the arms of another person. What is important here is whether you and your partner have what it takes to survive this and become stronger and more unified as a result. Providing that the party that had the affair is honestly regretful, the marriage still can exist, and even better than before.

Why stop your infidelity? Think about when you first started this affair. Did you feel guilt? Why did reasons you feel this guilt. Was it because you loved your spouse, you didnt want to hurt them, or you didnt want your marriage to end? You love them and you two built a marriage together.

Why stop your infidelity? This affair you have going is filled with excitement, intrigue and a sense of danger from the sneaking around. Is it really something that will last past those feelings? Is it a relationship that will stand the test of time? It wont, when those feelings are gone, the thrill of your relationship will be gone. You will want to crawl back to that strong rock, your spouse. Make the decision yourself before it is too late.

Another good reason to end the infidelity is because no one knows you like your spouse, the person you have lived with for years on end, who has seen you at your best and at your worst. Despite hard times, they have remained with you. They love you, and you still love them. This ugly dishonest relationship on the side is driving a wedge between the both of you. You need to stop it.

If you both have the strength and endurance to get past the affair, then you will survive. Your love for each other will grow deeper. You married each other for a reason and that is why you will stay married.

About the Author:

Infidelity creates a pain like no other. At the Affair Recovery Center we know from experience. We can help you cope with infidelity. Don’t suffer another day. Start healing from infidelity right now.